I had no idea I was under the influence of a drug, an addiction.
For much of my life I have been managing my body and feeling "OK" as long as I could hold out the hope that, "this time it will be different, this time i will easily overcome the struggle".
I thought I was on the path to eating 'healthy', not in a 'process-addiction' (like a gambler). The more I hoped that the struggle would get easier, the harder it seemed to get.
It was only until recently that I discovered that after 30 years of trying to manage my body, I could NEVER win the "war" - yes I said war. The reason I could never win the war was because my body was rebelling from a natural physiological approach to keep me safe. Safe? Yes Safe... I was continuously putting myself in harms way. From my body's perspective even thinking about cutting back or managing was gonna make it store FAT ...DANG!
I call this journey an 'unlearning' because as children, when we had yummy food available, we knew how much to feed our bodies and when to stop. Now that I'm on this journey I'm so excited and little scared to see what unfolds... until next time.
No comments:
Post a Comment